Cars! Cars! Cars!

Silent But Deadly

Now we're not saying there's def an issue here, but the first time we saw a hybrid turn off the engine and still do stuff... well, friggin' bicycles are louder.

Will silent cars kill? Will hybrids be forced to make artificial noise like digital cameras do? Will Alison Krauss* finally, good God finally, realize our love is just for the taking?

Referenced articles
Engadget: Pedestrian Safety Act of 2009 to investigate the dangers of silent automobile engines

*1. We picked this snap because of see-throughness. We are shallow. 2. We are considering totally moving on from Alison because, good golly she's following David Vitter and Bobby Jindal on Twitter? We knew she was too good to be true, but we had to go and prove it, right? Sigh. Can't a company of men just lust after a woman who's not following some evil?

Fancy Ford Gettin' Friendly With O

Man, we could have come up with all sorts of headlines!

1. Ford Meets The Big O
2. Screw Chrysler
3. Is Ford The Missing Piece?
4. Ford Gets Big Sale From Government Because They Are Fiscally More Sound And Don't Make Nearly As Many POS As Other American Car Makers
5. Ah Ha! Fusion! We Get It! It Fuses Regular Old Engine And New Fangled Whatchmcallit... Mmm, Candy.

Of course, it's just two dudes in the Obama administration so it's not like the whole U.S. fleet is going Ford. And, really, two sales ain't a big deal. Unless you are an automaker. In which case, Jaysus, tell your friends!

Referenced articles US News & World Report: Ford Scores Another Obama Hybrid Sale

Georgia Is Like Something During The Something: They Don't Get It

A car with super-low emissions can't pass the Georgia emissions test. So awesome. Kicking Tires reports: Georgia Emissions Tests, Toyota Prius Don't Mix.

See, the Prius turns off the engine when it comes to a stop, so there is no idling engine exhaust to check. Gah! Stupid lower-polluting vehicle! So the dude's car failed inspection.

It's very clear what the dude did wrong. He didn't spit his tabacky correctly! Or he didn't get busy with his nubile sister. Oh, we kid the backwards hillbillies from Georgia. We're sure they meant to learn to test the car that don't pollute as much. But they were busy with their sheep. We kid!

We got the snap from Image*After. They seem a'ight.

Mazda's New Car Is Sooooo Quiet, It's Like It's Not Even Made!

CNN reports: Mazda unveils new hydrogen hybrid.

Mazda unveiled a new kind of hybrid vehicle on Tuesday that runs on hydrogen fuel powering an electric motor. The Japanese automaker said it will be available for leasing in Japan next year.

After the lease runs out, Mazda will collect the cars back from lessees, crush them and ask GM to let them back into the "cool boys" club. Please! Please! Please!

Hybrids: Jah!

AutoWeek reports: Audi Ready to Bring Hybrid to U.S. Well look who's jumping on the hybrid wagon just eight years into the ride? L'il ol' Audi.

Adding a hybrid to the Q7 we see, eh? Wow, bet the environmentalists are thrilled and Toyota is quaking in its boots! We're talking 23 mpg for the Q7! Nice. There goes the threat of global warming!

How about this: add the diesel to the Q7 and hybrids to the rest of the lineup that's actually being purchased by more people? That's how to make a difference.

Ford Sees Plug-in Hybrids In 5-10 years, Bankruptcy in 2

CNN reports: Ford sees plug-in hybrids in 5-10 years.

Ford Motor Company Chief Executive Alan Mulally says he expects the company to sell plug-in hybrids in five to 10 years.

Ford Escape Hybrids are being used as taxis in San Francisco (above) and New York.

"Within five to 10 years we will start to see this technology in our hands," Mulally said on the sidelines of a press event to announce an alliance between Ford and utility Southern California Edison to test 20 rechargeable electric vehicles.

Five to 10? Come on, man! Everyone knew this was coming. We're talking 2017 before we can plug in a Pinto? They still make Pintos, right? Boom!

We seriously wonder if Ford will even be around in 10 years. In fact, Mulally might as well predict "Free cars in 5-10 years. With hookers. And booze! ... Well, forget the cars and booze."

NO NO NO

Well, maybe. No! Edmunds reports: Cadillac 2-mode hybrids being rumored. No!

Look, Cads... Can we call you Cads? Lexus is indeed a worthy foe, but just because they are making silly hybrids doesn't mean you should, too. Let Lexus make those silly things while we refine, refine, refine your gasoline engines. If you want to go for a surprise, come out with a clean diesel that'll do 50 mpg on the highway.

You are Cadillac and you do not follow the well-traveled road.

Holy Hybrids!

No, not holy as in THE LORD, but in sales. Edmunds reports: Hybrids continue to gain favor at Toyota. Check out these stats:

Prius sales in 2007: 52,738, up 73%
Mustang sales in 2007: 47,082, down 16%

That's serious car sales action! It makes sense with fuel prices up so much, but we were really taken by surprise that a Prius was selling this well (and the Mustang this poorly). The article mentions "Toyota's lineup of hybrids, Prius, Camry and Highlander, outsells the entire VW brand." Ha! That's insane! It's also funny that VW and the like seem to have v little interest in creating hybrids.

Lexus Is Stupid

CNN reports: Lexus announces new flagship hybrid. Let's make a hybrid for the most gluttonous among us. This is a mockery of what hybrids stand for.

Fusion Hybrid? About Frakkin' Time!

Jalopnik reports: Over The Back Fence: Ford Fusion Hybrid To Debut At LA Auto Show?. Well, ain't that a fine how do you do? Ford's decided fuse together a regular engine and an electric engine. A sort of freakish hybrid, if you will.

The Fusion is a decent ride. We hope this story is true -- we'd love to see the Fusion throw a little face around the hybrid arena.