Cars! Cars! Cars!

Toyota Offers Up Land Crusier With Godzilla-Like Pricing

AutoWeek reports: 2008 Toyota Land Cruiser Pricing Announced". Holy crow!

Price: $64,000
Engine: 5.7l, V-8
Power: 381hp
Fuel economy: Shh....

$64k for a Toyota? That's a ton of dukets. As in, you'll need an SUV to carry the cash to the dealer. See, GM? If you make good products, you can charge up the wazoo. We mentioned that in a very odd rant some time ago (hell if we can find it now, though). When we see GM and the rest of Detroit starting to raise prices then maybe we'll think they really believe they are making a better product (the longer warranties are just to get folks back into the showroom).

Saab Drinks From The No-No Juice

Autoblog reports: Saab 9-4X to share a platform with new compact Cadillac CUV.

Not only did Autblog mention this, but so did LeftLaneNews. Oh, LLN, you've got a typo in this head: Saab 9-4x to bow in Detroit. It's "Saab 9-4x to blow in Detroit." Zing!

Is Saab making the 9-4x because the 9-7 (9-7x?) sold so well? Is Saab doing it because they've figured out a way to get really, really good gas mileage from a truck? Is Saab doing it because the future is clearly all about trucks and SUVs? Is Saab trying to justify its existence?

God dammit. Look, Saab, here's the deal: Make cars. That's it. No SUVs or CUVs or any of that crappola. Do things a bit different, get 35mpg on the highway and don't mess with the seats. Why do we have to be mad at everyone, everyday?

Lajdziak: Jefferson The Vue!

As in, movin' on up! AutoWeek reports: Saturn's Sticker Shock. Yeah, the Saturn Vue is a bit more spendy now (it's a whopping $3295 over the previous base), but folks seem to have a better opinion of the thing. It's not yet for sale, so we're not sure how so many folks have fluffly bunny thoughts about it, but whatevs.

Before you get all WTF on the Vue, that extra bump in price comes with bigger engine, automatic transmission and is in line with the competition. So, Saturn is going lugnut to lugnut on price. Think the quality is there? The value?

Canada: We're Puttin The Hate Your SUVs, Ya Hosers

The Detroit News reports: Canadian 'incentives' will hit U.S. automakers, analysts say.

Auto analyst Dennis DesRosiers said Tuesday the Canadian government should be concerned with how automakers might react to its budget plan, which favors hybrid cars with a rebate of up to $2,000 on the purchase but puts a $4,000 tax on SUVs and other vehicles that use large amounts of fuel.

In other news, President Bush declares war on BorderTerrorists.

Gender Bending

Autoblog reports: Next Ford Explorer to be a CUV. This is precisely why Ford isn't going to win. By following trends. Be the trend-setter, Ford! Come on!

And if the Explorer is going to a car-based CUV what's to become of the Edge? And what about the pretty little Escape? And don't forget the manly Expedition? Gonna put a little skirt on the Excursion, paint its nails and take it out for some God-damned tea and crumpets?!

So, Ford's gonna neuter the Explorer, shows off the not-ready for primetime Interceptor, and ends the Freestar. How is this a way forward?

Toyota Should Be Worried

AutoWeek reports: Slipping Sequoia. What kind of sick company tries to have it both ways? Yes, Toyota's Prius is great (and a handy hatch as a commenter pointed out) and we dig the Camry Hybrid. The Camry Hybrid is a smart move and far better choice than the Accord hybrid (don't buy the Accord hybrid). But, Toyota's not so hidden secret is that it makes a lot of big vehicles. Big. Stand next to an '06 Sequoia. It's huge!

Now get ready for the next one. 'Cause it's bigger, baby!

It's so big Toyota is now thinking:

"I worry about the Sequoia being too big and not having enough fuel economy, more than I do with the (redesigned) Tundra," said Don Esmond, senior vice president of automotive operations at Toyota Motor Sales U.S.A. Inc.

In unrelated news, Mr. Esmond has been attacked by upwards of 45 ninjas and has yet to be seen since that quote. And the ninja thing.

Hey, Toyota, cut it out with the silly-big shite and get back down to Earth. Heh, ninjas.

That's a snap of 2007 Camry Hybrid. With some mountains. Man, Toyota's gotta work on its press site... the photo section is really awful. Anyway, want a bordering-on-large family car that gets good gas mileage? Look no further. And don't look at the Accord Hybrid... what a mistake Honda made. Fix it already, Honda!

Hyundai And The Big SUV

Talk about crappola timing! The Car Connection reports: Hyundai Calls Big Ute Veracruz. Question: What's bigger than a Honda Pilot, has more room than a Mercedes-Benz GL, and has a six-speed automatic? Answer: A mistake!

Oh, we kid! We love Hyundai. But we're bigger fans of the Sonata than we are their little truckie dealies. We're hoping the Elantra GT gets updated soon so we can get back to some Hyundai hatchback lovin'.

Hippies To Rock On

The Car Connection reports: Hybrid Owners of America , Unite! Look, we totally support the hybrid movement. Hybrids aren't the total solution, but they are the representation (conservation) of the solution the same as SUVs are the representation of the problem (gluttony). SUVs owners have their own club so why not the hybrid folks?

Is there going to be a battle between these folks soon? Maybe! Not that we are betting people, but in a fight we're pretty sure the SUV owners will shoot the hybrid folk without much of a thought.

Meanwhile, we hard at work creating the Alison Krauss Lovers of America club. For the record, by "lovers" we don't mean those that appreciate her kind of music. We're focused mainly on her GM.

GM To Cut Production; Lower Profits To Follow?

AutoWeek reports: GM may cut truck production. Oh, this article is saying may but, come on. Really, come on. SUV sales are going to fall pretty far, friend. Gas is only going to go up.

Didn't GM say that these things were selling well? So what's the problem?

Through July, GM has built an estimated 324,000 GMT900 trucks at its plants in Arlington, Texas; Janesville, Wis.; and Silao, Mexico. GM has sold 231,305 GMT900s through July.

You know, the sorta funny thing is that the GMT900 models are really very good. What? You ask? You're a car blog. How can you say that?! you exclaim. Oh, relax, Alison, we say as we rub your shoulders and tell you that we're just misunderstood. How did you get your pants to fall off that way? you ask.

Thomas Friedman Kickin' Ass And Takin' Names

Autoblog reports: Thomas Friedman of NYT talks back to GM. We actually don't know if Mr. Friedman is kickin' ass or taking any names—the frickin NY Times has his article behind the wall of money so we can't read it*. But based on what a friend told Autoblog, we hear-tell Mr. Friedman gave the ol' smackdown on GM.

the automakers produced flex-fuel capable vehicles in order to take advantage of a federal loophole that increased the overall mileage of each company's fleet to within federally mandated limits. Friedman cites the 2006 GMC Yukon 2WD that actually gets 15 mpg city and 20 mpg highway, though is rated at 33 mpg in order to meet the government's CAFÉ standards. Only by producing these vehicles as flex-fuel capable were the automakers able to take advantage of this loophole.

If that's true, it's pretty lame. If it's not true... well, it would still be lame.

*While we could have taken the paper off of Hobo Joe, we figure it won't be too long before we're in the same boat (er, bench) and that the whole "what goes around, comes around" thing comes back to haunt us. Sleep well, friend.