You are only an American if you speak English and drive an American car. The English language is defined not by those with the British accent, but the American one. The language of "um, uh, tawk, dawg." It also helps if you are blonde and have big boobs. An American car is defined as one made with these badges: Ford, Lincoln, Mercy, GMC, Chevrolet, Buick, Pontiac, Chrysler, Dodge, Jeep, Cadillac, Hummer (bonus points for this one), and Saturn. If you own anything else you are a traitor. And need to park somewhere else.
Anyway, since we are already segregating and making racial slurs, let's make sure we do so intelligently and don't make any mistakes (no sense in looking like a durn fool about it): List of ethnic slurs.
It's very important to make people feel badly about their purchases by pointing out that by buying a non-American product that they are personally responsible for the fall of the American car companies, the state of economy, and your failing prostate. Be prepared to defend their counter-attacks of "American quality has really fallen" and "the competition is more reliable" and "the styling is so much nicer" and "the companies back up their product," and "this car was made in Guatamala." The most effective counter-counter attack is to question their: loyalty, manhood, and promiscuity. If these fail, please feel free to fall back to the old standard, "fucking commie."
By the way, these posters rock.