AutoWeek reports: Break through. Like a rock. Let's motor. Some of the current slogans are great; the two that come to mind are Mini's "Let's Motor" and Mazda's "Zoom-zoom." And we give credit to Mazda for having the balls to use zoom-zoom when, at the time they started using the slogan, the cars weren't all that zoom-zoomy. In related news, we've gone through the stashes from our dumpster-diving days (Mon.–Thurs.) and have found all of the unused slogans from car manufacturers:
Audi: Unintended Acceleration, Our German Asses!
BMW: The Motor Vehicle That Is Most Great To Drive, Jah?
Buick: More Quiet Than Your Coffin.
Cadillac: Now We're Goin' For Angles!
Chevrolet: At Least The Corvette Rocks!
Chrysler: Are We German? Nein!
Dodge: We Kicked Plymouth's Ass!
Ford: Fine On Rainy Days.
Honda: Wonderful Future Life. Be Prepare!
HUMMER: So Big, It'll Get You One.
Hyundai: Our Cars Wide. Besides The Point.
Infiniti: (sounds of ocean waves)
Isuzu: Joe Isuzu Is Dead Already. Please Come Buy Our Cars.
Jaguar: Remember The Past.
Jeep: Ruining Forests One Backwards Hillbilly At A Time.
Land Rover: A Queen's Car.
Lexus: We Are Going To Kick Mercedes In The Ass So Hard, Germany's Gonna Start Another God-damned War! Booyah!
Lincoln: Help Us Reach Higher; We're Stuck.
Mercedes-Benz: Germany Is Strong Once Again!
Mercury: Old Is Good.
MINI: Better Than The Vicker's Lorry.
Mitsubishi: From Zeros To Heros.
Nissan: To Qualify Please Note.
Pontiac: We Build Excrement!
Porsche: Driving Like An Ass Makes The Ladies Want You.
Saab: Big Enough For Your Hooterglaven.
Saturn: Our Division Hasn't Closed. But It Should Have. Did You See The Ion? What A Turd.
Scion: Get Laid In Your Own Car.
Subaru: Subame? No! Subaru!
Suzuki: Good God, We Make Cars, Too!
Toyota: Dead Men Beware. Energy Is Power Here.
Volkswagen: Electrical Problems: Nein!
Volvo: Boxes Are Sexy.