NY Times: Ford Makes Cars
The NY Times (registration required) reports: Ford Reports Losing Money in 3rd Quarter. We covered this already, but we got a kick out of The Times's headline. We could imagine a Times headline about randomly exploding airbags: "Ford Reports Airbag Anamoly, Smiles Prettily."
Toyota Makes Its Own Parts
AutoWeek reports: Bucking the trend, Toyota controls quality, cost by making many parts in house. God, we hope AutoWeek doesn't pay by the word. We started reading this article yesterday and we just woke up now! Not only don't we remember much, but there's drool everywhere and it's really gross. All we remember is Toyota makes many of its own parts and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
The Great Debate
CNN/Money reports: Debate over clean-car technology. Apparently there was a real debate over in Japan during some car show thing. Here's the run down:
Most automakers agree that fuel-cell cars powered by hydrogen produced with renewable energy sources are the end game since they would rely on no fossil fuels and emit only pure water. But most said the technology was at least a decade away.At least a decade away. If these dinosaurs are willing to admit stuff is at least a decade away we all know what they're really saying, "Hydrogen cars will come after I retire. So if I can continue down the same road and get my fancy retirement package I'll be happy." This section pretty much sums up Japan vs. the World:
BMW also said that hybrids will never be more than a niche market (they currently don't make any hybrids). VW, of course, agrees with BMW. Hey! VW doesn't make any hybrids, either. Heh.On the other hand, Toyota Motor Corp. is eager for hybrids to take off, adding the powertrain option on more models. Among them will be the Lexus LS flagship sedan, a hybrid concept of which was unveiled at the auto show on Thursday.
In addition to working on hybrid and fuel-cell technology, other Japanese automakers such as Honda Motor Co. and Nissan are scrambling to improve control systems on internal combustion engines to achieve better fuel economy.
"With all these possibilities on the horizon, it's tough to predict what the future is going to hold," Ford Motor Co. Director Mary Ann Wright said. "But we believe there are going to be many solutions, and that's why we're taking a portfolio approach."
Larry Burns, vice president of research and development at General Motors, said this proliferation of powertrains was holding back progress in fuel-cell technology as auto makers stretch their limited resources thin and wide.
"I think we need to think hard about making the automobile dramatically simpler with hydrogen and fuel cells," Burns told Reuters, noting that a fuel-cell propulsion system had one-tenth as many moving parts as an internal combustion engine.
What to drastically reduce the amount of fossil fuel we all use? Make a better public transportation system! We know that sounds funny coming from a car site and we don't expect any of the car makers to ever acknowledge this, but it's the truth.
Why Does GM Have A Blog?
That's a good question. Jalopnik reports: Between the Lines: Lutz in the Blogosphere. And then Jalopnik rips Bob Lutz a new one. All hail Jalopnik and we pray they don't read our site for fear of crapping on us the way they crapped on poor, misunderstood Bobby Lutz.
Bill Ford to Start A-Beggin'
Autoblog reports: Bill Ford to star in first ads since 2002. For some reason we didn't write about this before, but we were actually on the set for part of the commericial shoot. It went like this:
Director: Cut!
Bill Ford (to Director): How am I doing?
Director: Is all that begging and crying really needed?
Bill Ford: Uh, yes.
Director: And the lying?
Bill Ford: That's marketing.
Us: It's smartketing!
Director (to us): First, no yelling on the set. Second, who are you? Third, where are your pants?
Mustache Claims No Further Job Cuts
eMercedesBenz.com reports: Zetsche Denies Further Job Cuts. He's got a big ol' mustache, don't he?
Japan: Sorry We Destroyed You So Easily
The Detroit News reports: Japan exudes optimism as Detroit hunkers down. First off, the lead of this article sounds like it came right out of Japan's car industry's PR firm:
In sharp contrast with the gloom settling over Detroit, Japan's car makers exuded quiet confidence this week at the motor show here that their focus on fuel-efficient, innovative and high-quality vehicles was paying off.Heh, that still makes us laugh. Not that it isn't true but it's so in your face to Detroit. We bet that PR staff (that obviously wrote that lead) also had a lead written pretending it was for Detroit. In fact, they did and we got a copy of it: "In sharp contrast to the exuberance radiating from Japan, Detroit's car makers sulked quietly in a corner at Joe's bar where they lamented on their lack of focus, propensity to care only about this quarter's numbers and their boring (not to mention poorly-build), outdated car designs." Okay, we made that up. Anyway, the real article continues:
Entering the biannual show on a wave of sales and profits, Japan's largest automakers unveiled a raft of new models that signal their designs on the future. Reflecting the upbeat sentiment, Honda Motor Co. displayed a trio of concept cars under the slogan "Fine Times."He then put his head in his hands and wept quietly. The best quote in the whole piece was this:"It's definitely a different mood here in terms of innovation and confidence, and we have to get some of that back in the domestic car industry," said Joe Eberhardt, executive vice president for sales at DaimlerChrysler AG's Chrysler Group.
"We have a lot to be proud of," he added, citing improvements in the quality and styling by Detroit's automakers.
"I didn't expect GM and Ford to be in this kind of state," Honda CEO Takeo Fukui said pensively. "I'm not sure I understand the reasons."In order to help Mr. Fukui understand, we drove over a recent Chevrolet Monte Carlo to show him a Detroit-built state-of-art motor car. Mr. Fukui drove the car around for 3.5 minutes.
Us: Well? What did you think?
Mr. Fukui: You have shamed me. This is very shameful and now I must bathe myself. I hope I don't carry any of this back to Honda. Oh, here's the rearview mirror. It broke off when I was adjusting it.
He then vomited on our shoes.

Comments